A warning…this post is actually fairly serious. I usually keep a pretty light tone, but a thought hit me like a bolt of lightening the other day and I needed to write (or in this case, blog) about it before it flew away and became nothing more than a faint echo in the back of my mind.
Yesterday I was having my girls put their toys away towards the end of the day. This is probably the most miserable time of day, because even if there are only three toys on the entire floor it will still take them no less than 45 minutes and 50 reminders to pick those three toys up. By the end I am usually aggravated, hurt, and not sure whether to cry or laugh or yell. I usually begin launching into some lecture about how I didn’t get the fun of playing with the toys so I shouldn’t have to pick them up. Or how I am the one who cleans everyone’s clothes, brush almost everyone’s teeth, give baths, sweep, cook, etc. and all they have to do is pick their toys up at the end of the day. Or there is the one I launched into yesterday in the midst of my frustration: I know somewhere deep down you love me…if you love me why is it so hard to do this one small task for me? I’m not asking much. They don’t have to scrub grout, pull weeds, or even pick up dog poop…they just need to put away a few toys. It’s a mess they made in the first place. I was a little surprised to realize I was quite hurt by the fact that my girls couldn’t be bothered to pick up a few toys for me after all I do for them. Yeah, yeah…they’re two and four. Not exactly old enough for any type of deep reasoning but it still hurt.
Here’s where the aforementioned bolt of lightening strikes. How often is God saying this to me? How many messes do I make and then want to continue playing while God cleans it up? How often does he take care of all my needs but when He asks one thing of me I procrastinate, or whine, or complain? If I really loved Him, shouldn’t I do the few things he asks of me…and do it knowing how much, much, much more He does for me? I go through life blowing Him off. I go about my daily routine without so much as a thought towards what He has done to make my life what it is. I know the things he asks of me…love Him with all my heart, soul, mind, and strength. To love my neighbor as myself. To go and tell others about Him. But I hum and haw. I focus on what I want instead of what I could be doing to demonstrate my love for Him. I think of the hurt I felt, that the girls I loved so much had demonstrated so little love towards me in that moment. Yes I knew they loved me, but their actions cut through me. How much more God must feel it, from all of his creation. This thought humbled me and I needed to share it. I promise more lighthearted frivolity in future posts, but end with this humbling thought: what have I done recently to show God my love?